#END OF PROSTITUTION 19

She took a deep sigh "Is something wrong with me?" Then her other self replied, "No... how could it be? After all, I used to......." Memories of her hostel room where she lived alone before getting married, flashed before her eyes, leaving a smile on her face. 

"I don't even know what Vipin and Bansi discussed tonight.....and this is not the right time to ask Vipin about that. But yes, one thing is for sure, it wasn't what Radhika told and she always talks about. What terminology she uses....." she tried to recall and succeeded too, "yes! it's stuffed versus satiated. Surely, I'm stuffed, sort of overdosed and not satiated..... No, not at all" she nodded with resolve. "Where did I cross the boundary from Satiation to Stuffed?" She tried to assess that but didn't succeeded this time. 

Suddenly, something else struck her, "And he has also swallowed that pill today!" the notion made her turn back in a jerk but immediately after, she realized that Vipin is still awake and he was smoking in balcony; so, she turned away, softly, as she didn't want him to notice that she was still awake. 

"With the pill, he bulldozed the limits and without that he remains much below the expected level. And also, pills couldn't be swallowed as a permanent solution for a whole lifetime." She was sort of confused while thinking it over. "There must be a median....yes! it must be there, and that's something..., perhaps, the thing, Radhika is trying to convey. Well....only she could tell more of it tomorrow; I better get the sleep, it must be quite late in the night".  With the notion, she tried to cool her mind off and sleep, at least she thought so.

In the balcony, Vipin was engulfed in his own storm "Is Bansi or for that matter, Radhika are any different than I or Neha?....Had any such thing been there, they might have mentioned.. or at least hinted; at least Neha should have been told, or may be she forgot and missed on that.....possibly". He nodded in affirmation as if something important was noticed.

Cigarette was finished, he hadn't removed it from his lips for even once and he realized that it was finished only after he tried a puff that didn't deliver. He blew the stub away and decided to go to bed. Near the bed, he made every possible effort not to let her feel anything.

Though, he'd joined Neha in bed, yet, he didn't feel like getting closer to her, he didn't either feel like sleepy. He was still under heavy clouds, roaring and thundering one after the another, "What did he actually mean by tight rope walk?". This tight rope walk puzzle was something that hit him again and again.

"What's wrong in getting directions if it's coming from someone competent, having worked and surmounted them" with this thought, he turned against Neha. "What if it doesn't work? .... But it has worked for them and it may work for me too" he reassured himself.

"Oh My God...." he was shocked to see the alarm at bedside, it was 4 AM. "I must get to sleep now" He murmured to himself.

Alarm was ringing....

Continued....

vinxn2003

#End of Prostitution 18

"Off course... actually, what would I do with that...without you?" she heaved a sigh of relief and hugged him tight, whispering, "You are so nice...", more deep, long breathes.

Lights went off; Vipin spooned Neha from behind. He was still not at ease. 

"Sleepy?" he whispered at her ear.

"Yhess" she replied with a louder whisper and caught hold of his hand that was going mischievous; "Please....., I'm fine; really!".

"Sure?" he, as if reconfirmed. "Definitely", pat came the reply.

Silence!....... though only apparently.

"What would he think about me...?; actually both of them, as Radha also knows everything" his mind was pacing.

"Neha told that they themselves got it in around an year" his other self assured him. "I'm also in the same time zone"

"But they found it during that period" another thought.

"Someone might have helped them too; did Radha also have a similar friend or relative?" As if two solicitors arguing a case in his mind. "That's possible, otherwise Bansi doesn't appear smarter than I am; I am stronger too. Probably, Bansi might have found someone or something that helped".

He talks about Naturopathy, he definitely has got some herbs etc. Otherwise how could he be better than I am?

"How about his.........eeegghh" He forgot where he was and couldn't check his sound now that startled Neha, who off course, was not asleep at all. "What's up?" she asked, unmoved. 

"Nothing; Good Night" he could only reply while changing side. 

"I didn't inquire about his diet and routine too....I should have; but how could I ? I wasn't mentally free even for a minute after we met".

"He almost kept me hostage; I was mesmerized and followed him like a calf to it's mother" he smiled on himself.

"I'll ask next time.  And what would I tell him; O yes, he would surely talk about that. What then....." this very thought perplexed him, he changed side.

"I'll make it clear to him to mind his own business and don't try mess up in my life. But.... I surely need help and on my own I have tried all the possible avenues that all resulted in failure".

"The only problem is him to be from our circle. He could spill out the junk any moment and that would be quite humiliating."

"What's wrong in it, he himself was a failure at it".

"But he succeeded at last......., what if I don't; and this stupid Neha shall be announcing it to each and everybody coming her way".

OMG! what if she......", the very thought made him jump and he was up in a fraction of a second. "No...no, she can't......besides, I will tell her not to meet Bansi ever" he assured himself and stole a glance at Neha. She was apparently asleep....only apparently. However, she didn't let it come out, though she somehow sensed something to be going on with him.

Vipin took to the pillow, on his back now. Then he felt an acute desire to have a cigarette lit. He got out of bed, trying his best not to get Neha awake, and moved to the balcony. Once there, he turned around and groped the console above threshold.

"Yes..." the touch of packet felt like never before. It seemed lighter.

"I took just one out of it, why does it seem empty" he opened the packet in a haste and found only one stick there in it. Then he noticed something written on the packet that he didn't care about at first.

"Not even one next time....only I am entitled to kill you"

"What the heck?" he threw the empty pack out of balcony and moved stealthily to kitchen. Once there, he started looking for match box. Visibility was poor but he couldn't dare switch the light on. Ultimately, he found it and lit the cigarette. Putting the match box at it's place, he came back to balcony, the same way he went to the kitchen.

Next train of thoughts whistled "What would she tell her tomorrow?" Cigarette between his lips, both his hands on railing.

Neha slowly turned her head around, his bare back was visible under dim effect of street light; legs should also be there. 

She rolled her neck back as it was "Nothing what she said happened....it appearing......, surging......, devastating.....and, then bidding adieu just like a train passing a traveler standing on the platform, without taking a halt!" 

She was wondering, "What about those melodious whistles of approaching and departing fairy-train that never stops at the station, come what may. The train that doesn't allow eagerly awaiting passengers an entry to secure a berth. The only evidence of having witnessed that is the view of passenger who now is drenched and ecstatic as against the cracking dry and scorching one in a desert she was before it's arrival".

"You never get a seat in it this way, but you could hear someone calling from inside "See you", she recalled Radhika telling her. "The difference in natural and manual is that of being ecstatic and being exhausted".

"I didn't feel ecstatic but exhausted and drained...., yes, the tranquility that she told prevails on the shores after the storm, is indeed here, but.......it's not axactly what she told. What did she mean actually?" 

She took a deep sigh "Is something wrong with me?......No... how could it be? I used to......." Memories of her hostel room where she lived alone before getting married flashed before her eyes, leaving a smile on her face.

Continued....

vinxn2003